Miracles

I'm blessed to live in an area with an awesome Christian radio station, KSBJ. On my way home from work this morning they were discussing those God moments. It made me think of one of mine. Before I went back to school, my main job was running a long term heart-lung bypass machine called ECMO. We are one of the few centers in the country that not only do neonates but also pediatric and adult patients. The survival rate for children and up is only about 50/50. We had had several bad runs with bad outcomes. It always seemed to be that I was the one there to watch the child die. One night I was sitting the pump and this little girl we were pumping was not doing well at all. Her run had been one of the worst. It was about 4am and she was dying in spite of all we were doing. There isn't much more to offer than complete heart/lung bypass. I called the surgeon to let him know she was going down. He gently said that we had offered all we had to give her and to just keep doing the best I could until the family could get there. I began praying, selfishly I will admit now. I just couldn't imagine watching another child die or listen to another parent say their final goodbyes to their child. I prayed with all my might that God would not let this child die. I was working feverishly and praying just as hard. Before my eyes, in a literal blink of an eye, she got better. I had to start weaning her off the pump because she was doing so well. When the surgeon called back to check on things I told him we were ready to come off pump. He just couldn't believe it. We took her off that morning but not to die like I had thought we would. She was better. She was alive. In medicine we try to say it was this medicine or this treatment that cured the patient. But, I'm here to tell you that in all my years of ECMO experience, there is no medical reason that child lived. God reached His hand down and healed her in the blink of an eye. To this day I'm still amazed when I think of it. Who knows why God spared that child's life. But, I do know He cared about my heart that day and I like to think spared me from the grief of another patient dying. I know my grief can't compare to the family's but it gets hard watching children die. It is hard listening to the parents say good-bye to their child for the last time. I cannot imagine the words I would say and could I ever say enough. How do you let your child go? I've witnessed it more times than I wish I could say, but I still don't know how, as a parent, you let go. We try to distance ourselves emotionally as nurses, but it isn't always possible. I've cried more times that I can count with my patients and on the way home. I do know that my job makes me realize how blessed I am to have healthy children, to cherish each and every moment with them, to enjoy watching them grow in wisdom, grace and absolute beauty. I'm thankful that I will be moving away from the ECMO pump in my new role as an NNP. I will still have some patients die but not like one on ECMO. It is NEVER an easy way to go. But, forever in my heart, will be the patients I have cared for and how they have so deeply touched my life and impacted it for the better.

Funniest First Dance Ever!

This has been circling the Internet but I just saw it for the first time. I have no idea who these people are but they seem to be quite the fun pair. It is so funny. Enjoy!

Girls with Apple Jack

The girls' cousin LaLa lives in the country and has a horse named Apple Jack. They love riding him and feeding him. They love to visit LaLa. Country living is nice. I was amazed at the number of stars you can actually see when there aren't the lights of the city in the way. And, yes, Sasha is in her PJs.

Twirling Hands

We have never understood why Sasha does this but she has done it since she was a baby in a bouncy seat. Whenever she gets excited she twirls her hands and even her feet. She gets so excited. If she is standing she will lift one foot off the ground and twirl it with her hands. We laugh about it. It is just our sweet girl and her excitement.

Licensed to drive?????

Sasha loves riding Grampy's lawnmower. She can't wait to get her license. Thank goodness that is still a few years away.

Family

We had the opportunity to go see Leopold's neice LaLa coach her girls softball team last Spring. Above are pics of us with Leopold's OLDER sister, she is also LaLa's Mom.

Last year LaLa coached HS girl softball and we got to go see one of her games. It was fun.

This is the girls' cousing LaLa with her husband and our nephew. The girls absolutely adore her. She is so wonderful to them and loves them so much. We love her too!

Yellow Bird's Pic of Mommy

Yellow Bird took this picture of me so I thought I would post it. She is so proud of it. She loves taking pictures and is constantly wanting to use the camera. I guess I will need to get a camera for her.

Puppet/Tea Party

The girls put on a puppet show/tea party. They dressed up and everything. Please know that this is but a mere fraction of the stuffed animals they have. It would take an arena to host all their animals. They had fun though.

My favorite

This is my favorite picture of us together. He is such an amazing husband as I have said in many post. I love him so much and I love the way he loves me. I love that I get to spend this life with him and feel so absolutely blessed to be his wife. He loves me like I don't feel I deserve which makes it all the more amazing. We are good together. We are a team. While I tell him I love him I don't show it like I should. So Honey, know that I love you so very much and am so glad that you picked me to spend this life with. It has been an undescribable journey. Some good and some bad but overall, amazing.

Love you with all my heart,

Sophie

I'm the coolest mom in the world

I got home from work before the family got home from gymnastics. I found a note for me, with a tootsie roll to boot that said I was the coolest mom in the world. There was even a picture drawn by Yellow Bird to prove it. I feel so loved and have the greatest kids in the world. BTW, has anyone noticed that Tootsie Rolls aren't as hard has they use to be. It seems like I never liked them because they were so hard it hurt my jaw. Now they seem softer. It is a good change. I just wonder how long they have been that way.

100 pounds ago

It may seem funny that I'm posting this right after my Keep Nick Thick post but I'm not Santa and being as big as him was physically painful. These pics are embarrassing and I've hesitated posting pics of myself before I lost over 100 pounds. I hated having my picture taken and hate looking at them. I can't believe how big I got. I blamed it on the months of bed rest I was on during my pregnancy with Yellow Bird. But, when she turned 5, it didn't seem like a valid excuse any longer. There are friends that never saw me at my biggest and said they couldn't picture me that big. Well, now you can. A pic is worth a thousand words. All I can say is never again. I feel too good now. My diabetes is gone, blood pressure good and my cholesterol is great. So, here they are. Losing all that weight was the best thing I could have ever done. Any questions feel free to ask. I cannot imagine carrying that weight around any more. No wonder I was so tired all the time. So, here they are. Take heed. Loose the weight. You will feel great!

Keep Nick Thick

With all that is going on in the world there are actually some people that are concerned that Santa Claus is fat. They want to trim him down because he is a bad example for our children. I guess I just think there are more important things in the world to worry about than Santa's weight. There is a website for a campaign to leave Santa and his weight issues alone. So what do you think, should Santa be fat or skinny. How jolly can he be if he is on a diet? That can put anyone in a bad mood. I say leave him alone.

We've been elfed

I have received so many of these and they are so funny that we decided to join in on the fun. Check us out.

Sonic Cheesecake Bites are the bomb!

The girls have been bugging me to try these and I wouldn't get them because, well, they have more than enough sugar in their diet. Well, tonight I caved, mostly because they didn't whine, I mean ask for them. Shouldn't have done that. They are sooooooo good. They are worth a try but be warned, I already want more. Everything in moderation.

Yellow Stang Sting, No Sting Back

You know the game were you punch someone when you see a VW Bug. Well our family has a different take on it. We all love Ford Mustangs (such a cool car). When we see one we say "(color of car) stang sting, no sting back. Give it a try it is fun. You will be surprised how many are on the road.

More Snow Pics

I found some more pics of our fun in the snow I thought I would share. I would really love to see snow again this year.

Sophie

Yellow Bird's Laughing Face

Yellow Bird's funny face. I am scary too.

Love,

Yellow Bird

A present for Jesus

Yellow Bird had become a Christian but was scared of being baptized. For some reason it just terrified her. It seemed out of character for her because she is such a take charge kind of child (see her tackling her Daddy). We told her that when she was ready she could do it and to pray about it and let us know. We were sitting in the Christmas Eve service, which was on a Saturday that year, and Yellow Bird leaned over and told me that she wanted to be baptized on Christmas Day. I asked her why she thought she was ready and she told me that it was her present to Jesus, herself. Isn't that all He ask of us. She bravely walked into the baptistery and her Daddy baptized her the next day, Christmas Day, and she gave Jesus herself as a present to Him. Happy Birthday Jesus!

Sophie

I'M DONE!!!!!!!

I cannot believe it but I'm done with school. I hate to say never but I don't ever plan on going back to school. Ugh! It is good to be done. I don't officially graduate until the 14th but for my part I'm done. Yeah!

Sophie

Differing perspectives

I published the post below and then read my friends blog.
It is funny the differing perspectives.

Sophie

Let It Snow!

It got up to 85 degrees today. I know this is south Texas but 85 degrees? I do remember plenty of Christmas Days spent in shorts but the warm weather makes me remember Christmas of 2004. For those of you that live up north, snow is no biggie. But, here in Texas it is. Sasha had been praying for months that it would snow here. I kept telling her that it just didn't snow that often down here. She persisted in her praying. When snow began to fall Christmas Eve we warned them that it probably wouldn't stick. Imagine our delight when we woke up Christmas morning to the pics you see. Even the presents took a backseat to playing in the snow. Did God blanket the Gulf Coast of Texas because a little girl prayed? Some would say no but I say yes and He chose Christmas morning for this miracle. The snow was pretty much gone by the next day but what memories were made! Thank you God for listening to a little girl who could envision much greater things than my jaded adult years would allow me to see. How amazing. Enjoy the pics. It isn't often you see a snowman on the beach.

Sophie

No, female, no!

I am a get 'er done kind of gal. I seldom take the time to think things through. I get a whim and go with it. This is very disturbing to my male counterpart. He is the kind that measures twice (maybe thrice) and cuts once. I can appreciated this approach but have little patience for it. Well, today we are working on Yellow Bird's room (pics to follow soon) and I'm diligently sanding down the chair rail for painting. Now the chair rail had to be removed and sanded because when I got the whim to finally paint the room I didn't take the time to tape off the chair rail and got pink paint all over it. So, Leopold removes it and I begin sanding. Well, there are still nails in it that I try to remove with my hands. This isn't working and since I can't find a hammer -- at least within reaching distance -- I grab the nearest, hammery like thing I can find, a paintbrush, and begin hammering out the nails with the paint brush handle. Leopold sees what I'm doing and says, "No, female, no". He then finds the hammer that was easily within reach and hands it to me. This isn't working either because the nails are now bent from my banging. So, I mention my dilemma to Leopold and tell him that there isn't a pully thing on this hammer. He looks at me with amazement as I point out the hammer that has a ball thing where the pully thing should be. He informs me that it is a claw. He is so technical. He tells me that wouldn't work anyway because these are finishing nails. I then say, "oh, they don't have a bully bob on the end". This conversation seems to leave him in amazement. I just finished a Master's degree but am using words like hammery thing, pully thing and bully bob. I inform him of how interesting I make life and he just shakes his head in agreement and laughs. Well, now I need to go paint the thingymabob with the brushy thing. A girls work is never done.

Sophie

P.S. When I went to spell check the blog, it had issues with some of my words. Computers must have been invented by a man.

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl

It is hard to believe and kind of sad, but my baby turns 8 today. Time has flown by. I can still remember the wee little bit she use to be. Now she is growing into a beautiful young lady and I'm so proud of her. She loves horses and gymnastics -- two of her favorite things. And, life would be awesome if the whole world were pink. Know that you are loved more than life itself and that Mommy and Daddy are so proud to call you our baby. Love you Sweetheart! Mommy

December 7th!!!!!

I hate to wish my life away but I cannot wait for December 7th. By then everything for school will have to be in and done. Grades for graduating are due that day so that is it. I hope to be done with everything before then but at least I know an end is in sight. This adventure as been a tough one. It is not one I'm sure I would do again. I'm glad I did it but now knowing what I do in hindsight I'm not sure it is a journey I would take. It has been at a great sacrifice of my family and myself to get through. I'm glad that I will have my Master's and I'm looking forward to my new role as Nurse Practitioner but it has been a tough road. I will take my boards in February or March and then will be done for good. But, having the schooling part behind me will be nice. I'm not sure I will know what to do with myself. Right now every free moment is studying or in clinicals. I will actually have some down time. I haven't had that in a very long time and I'm not sure what it will be like. But, I'm looking forward to having some undisturbed time with my family. Time in which I don't have to think about the paper that is due or the clinical the next day. It is almost over and I thank God for getting my through. I'm sure there will come a day when I will thank him for the journey but for now I will thank him for the end.

Sophie